ANOTHER MISS KEEPER MATTHEWS.--"P'RAPS IF YOU WAS TO SHOOT A LITTLE STRAIGHTER SIR---" SIR CHARLES.--"DON'T TALK TO ME; IT'S THE WIND, AND THE GUN'S WRONG, AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU'RE ALWAYS GETTING IN THE WAY."
Another Miss. (SEE CARTOON.)
WHEN a sportsman goes out With a keeper to shoot, It is galling, no doubt, If their toil bears no fruit; Then each other they twit On this failure to hit, And perhaps, when that's done, Both fall foul of the gun; But whosever the blame, And whatever they say, The result is the same--- Tha the birds get away.
So when Warren (Sir Charles) Makes a miss, he may halt And declare, with some snarls, That 'twas Matthews's fault. Matthews vowing 'twas not, But 'twas Warren's bad shot. Then perhaps both come hard Down on poor Scotland Yard.
British Savages [Murders, and attempts to murder, or maim by means of knife, revolver, or the vitriol-phial are increasing rapidly in England. Apart from the awful deeds in the first-named connection, over one hundred cases of vitriol throwing are reported in the northern suburb alone.]
TIME was when we sneered at the foreigner's way Of settling disputes with a stab or a shot, We mocked at the Spaniard, Italian, Malay, The wild Western "rowdy," the Turk, and what not; And the pistol (which both were in foreign parts rife), We used but the first, and we needed no aid From knife or revolver--revolver or knife!
But now, here in England, where once e'en the brute Made war with his firsts, or, at worst, with his feet-- That brute is now given to stab or to shoot, Yes, e'en in the usual "row" in the street. The pistol and poniard have lately become In daily request as the weapons of strife, And men, women, and children, in every slum Dread the knife and revolver, revolver and knife!
All this being thus--certain shops may be found (One especially, close to the Drury Lane slum), Where second-hand "bowies" and pistols abound, Each offered for sale at a moderate sum. Nice temptation for brutes and bloodthirsty curs To maltreat or murder their "women" or wives! Yet, despite daily outrage, the Law never stirs To check this large trade in revolvers and knives!
How long shall this loathesome hell-brood be allowed These weapons--and vitriol even--to buy? Once caught, all such scum with the lash should be cowed-- The garotter was wont at the nine-tails to cry. Sentimentalists long wished the lash were subdued But now that our brutes daily seek human life, E'en these faddists mayn't weep if we lash all the brood Who dare buy vitriol-bottle, revolver, and knife!
