Author: Philip Rayner
Saturday, 18 January 2003 - 07:06 am |        |
There were in fact two Erdu dictionaries and there was a fued between the creators. Tim 'The boring' Farquaharson* Smith created the first in 1891 after getting lost on the way from IKEA. His is the definitive and original dictionary from which my definitions come. The second was by Arnold 'the even more boring' wahoonie. This was a dictionary based on the idea that words were defined by actions in the Erdu lexicon.
Thus ingoomoo, whilst said jumping up an down with your hair on fire means 'Help my hair is on fire.'. If the same word is spoken whilst scratching ones nose it means 'You off to IKEA at the weekend. I personally do not subscribe to this theory preferring the purist view encompassed in the original Dictionary.
It is often asked why the original dictionary has so many references to JTR. This was because Farquaharson Smith had been in London just before he went to Outer Mongolia, was a keen student of the case, and seems to have been responsible for some cross cultural contamination. For instance the traditional dress of the Erdu people is a top hat, cape, Gladstone bag, salt and pepper trousers and a wicked grin.
The second dictionary is now considered a poor and ill-judged book (A 'Cornwell' in the Erdu language.).
*Ths is a real English name pronounced farson. We English are a strange race. |
Author: David O'Flaherty
Saturday, 18 January 2003 - 10:32 am | |
G. Gordon Liddy was the Ripper!
Wait, Liddy got caught. Never mind 
Dave |
Author: judith stock
Saturday, 18 January 2003 - 12:54 pm | |
Dear Phil..if the English are strange, then we are your direct descendants! Consider these odd bits:
Beauchamp is pronounced "beech-em"
Staunton is pronounced "stan-ton" (in Virginia, at least)
Buena Vista is pronounced "bew-na vista" (in Virginia, at least)
Greenwich is pronounced "grennich" in Connecticut and "green-wich" in Rhode Island
AND, Newark is pronounced "new-urk" in New Jersey and "new-ARK" in Delaware
AND, there is town just outside Houston, Texas called Old Dime Box....go figure.
Anyone else got any odd pronunciations, since that has soooo much to do with this thread????
J |
Author: Philip Rayner
Saturday, 18 January 2003 - 01:57 pm | |
| Rayner pronounced 'Idiot' |
Author: Mark Andrew Pardoe
Saturday, 18 January 2003 - 06:55 pm | |
Whatho all,
In Nottinghamshire the original Newark is pronounced New-urk whereas the nearby Southwell is Suth-el. Just south of Nottingham is Gotham (yes there is a real one) but this one is pronounced Goat-hum. Oh-hum!
Cheers Mark pronounced Mark |
Author: Brian Schoeneman
Sunday, 19 January 2003 - 02:18 pm | |
Everyone,
I'd like to get this thread BACK on track. It appears that while some irresponsible individuals have been enjoying funky pronounciations of words - such as Baltimore (which is correctly pronounced Bawl-mer) - too much, they have forgotten that we are trying to clear the name of one much maligned and abused sock puppet here. Have you people no shame?!
While we sit here and try and think up funny erdu phrases (such as Brian - defined as "full of BS, just look at his initials") A MURDERER IS WALKING AROUND LOOSE. How any of us can sleep while Howdy Doody marches around like Pinocchio on a two week bender, free to play golf with OJ and Robert Blake, I'll never know.
So let's get back to the investigating, and leave the ghoulish party fun to the Scarpetta fans.
Brian W. Schoeneman
Dewey, Cheatem and Howe
Attorneys-at-the-ballpark
Washington, DC |
Author: Philip Rayner
Sunday, 19 January 2003 - 02:31 pm | |
PARTY FUN?????
Sir, Erdu is a very serious study. I have been studying the subject since 1937 (Almost twenty to eight.) and feel maligned and cheapened by the slur that it is FUN. I must ask you to desist from these hurtful comments or I will hit you over the head with the dictionary. (Twenty volumes at the last count.). |
Author: Ally
Sunday, 19 January 2003 - 04:46 pm | |
| Will you hit him with them one at a time or holding them all together? |
Author: Rodney Gillis
Sunday, 19 January 2003 - 07:08 pm | |
| If you listen to the Kingston Trio's song "Hang Down Your Head Tom Dooly" backwards, it says that Jack the Ripper was Sebastion Cabot. |
Author: judith stock
Sunday, 19 January 2003 - 09:30 pm | |
Actually, Rodney, the Kingston Trio song, ZOMBIE JAMBOREE, if played sideways, accuses DOODY! Sebastian Cabot, as we all know, was King George IV, in a former life, and then re-incarnated into Queen Victoria.
To my partner in crime, of the Dewey, Cheatem and Howe Offices at the Ballpark, Brian....I apologise profusely; the sidetrack was my fault. I temporarily lost what was left of my mind, and veered into languages and being ert. You may dock my pay for that; it will NOT happen again.
SO SUE ME!!!
J |
Author: Philip Rayner
Monday, 20 January 2003 - 01:36 pm | |
| Oh all together Ally, I have a version all taped together expressly for the purpose of beating people up with. |
Author: Eduardo Zinna
Monday, 20 January 2003 - 04:09 pm | |
| Is this thread satirical yet? |
Author: James Jeffrey Paul
Monday, 20 January 2003 - 04:30 pm | |
Inspector Abberline was Jack the Ripper.
The actress Sarah Bernhardt jilted him, and he developed a pathological hatred of women.
His friends Prince Eddy and Walter Sickert helped him cover up his crimes. |
Author: Mark Andrew Pardoe
Tuesday, 21 January 2003 - 06:56 pm | |
Whatho all,
Everybody has overlooked Sooty's friend, the snake Ramsbottom. He doesn't have a beard but, by jove, he's got shifty eyes!
Anyway, we all really know the Ripper was that bearded, shifty eyed, artist Rolf Harris. "Poor Mary was just toooo weak the survive the night".
Cheers, Mark |
