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Casebook: Jack the Ripper - Message Boards » Creative Writing and Expression » JtR Poetry » Archive through October 14, 2003 « Previous Next »

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AP Wolf
Inspector
Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 412
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 07, 2003 - 1:39 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Well done chaps

I’m not so hot at this art form, requires logic which I sadly lack, but here’s my effort.

There was a young lady who went hopping in Kent
The chance to earn a few bob from heaven sent
But then she found the work was hard labour
And without a single penny to save her
back to Whitechapel the young lady went.
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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 918
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 07, 2003 - 2:06 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hi AP

So if the sexual posing was undertaken in order to disguise the primary motivations at work in the crimes, and if it was also a kind of childish game plus a means of showing everyone how grown-up he was, then that's how he'd have assumed everyone would view the crimes - as sexual.

When he then read about a "monster" being on the loose, he'd take this as a sign of feminine (and feminist) whingeing, on the one hand, and male hypocrisy on the other.

It's difficult to imagine just what was going through the mind of a person such as you describe. Who knows, maybe after the "sex games" he'd played on the street, he played the more mature "marriage game" in Kelly's room! Jack sitting by the fire, wife lying on the bed, and at dawn the man of the house leaves to go to work...

Robert
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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 919
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 07, 2003 - 2:11 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

PS Just seen the Limerick, AP. Very good.

Robert
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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 414
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 07, 2003 - 5:01 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Robert

I’ve cut to the Chase… and there are similarities between the Vampire of Sacramento and Jack the Lad in terms of their weird behaviour in the killing fields.
Of course right at the start it is best to get the gun out of the way. Yes, I know Richard Chase shot all his victims first but I believe this to be a historical vexation rather than a behavioural vexation. What I mean is both Jack and Chase used the weapons that were most easily available to them at that particular time in history, and those weapons were both designed to bring their victims down quickly, they both wanted dolls to play with and not a real person.
What is a real shame is that we know absolutely nothing about Jack’s earlier behaviour, the events that were to lead him eventually to experiment with humans, but Chase started off on rabbits and cats and worked his way up to cows in his bizarre quest for blood and organs. Police found him parked out in the desert with his pick-up full of buckets of blood and internal organs.
His first attacks on humans were remote, drive by shootings and the like, and one must imagine Jack progressing along a similar path but without gun perhaps he did silly little things like stabbing women in the bottom with a pair of scissors? Whatever he would have most certainly experimented with remote situations, even something so simple as chucking rocks at women.
When Chase eventually killed a woman his treatment of the body is worth mentioning, not nice but perhaps very relevant.
Left nipple carved off.
Torso cut open below sternum.
Spleen and intestines pulled out.
Stabbed in lung, liver, diaphragm and left breast.
Pancreas severed into two pieces.
Kidneys taken out but then put back.
Blood had been consumed at the site in a yogurt pot.
Dead woman left in a sexual pose.

I think there are striking similarities.
Chase and the police were kidding themselves when they both classified his crimes as the act of a ‘Vampire’ - for it was not really necessary to visit that type of destruction on a body to obtain blood and Chase’s direction seemed on the face of it to be sexual. When semen was found in another body it seemed to confirm this but ‘how now brown cow’ nothing is what it seems in the world of serial killers, for when Richard Chase stood up in court to defend himself he cited his life long inability to achieve an erection as the peculiar motive behind his crimes.
How then came the semen hence?
He used a tool to transfer it of course.

And for those who rigidly maintain that a serial killer’s behaviour can only be measured on an escalation scale, then I’m afraid Richard Chase blows a raspberry at you too.
For between killing his two female victims he went back to buying puppies and slaughtering them at home for their blood.
Which is of course where his story started.
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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 923
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 07, 2003 - 5:24 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hi AP

Definite similarities. And we don't know whether Jack tried to reassemble Mary Kelly at some point.

Re early experiments, it may be just coincidence, but Nichols was found outside a stables, and I'm sure I remember reading somewhere that there was a stable in George Yard. I believe there had at one time been a stable in Dutfield's Yard, but I know you don't count that one.

Robert
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Jim DiPalma
Sergeant
Username: Jimd

Post Number: 33
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Wednesday, October 08, 2003 - 10:12 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hi Robert,

Regarding the stable in George Yard, William Beadle claimed in "JTR: Anatomy of a Myth", that his suspect, William Bury, used to stable his pony and cart in George Yard. Perhaps that's where you read of it?

Cheers,
Jim
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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 929
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Wednesday, October 08, 2003 - 10:27 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hi Jim

I haven't read William Beadle's book, though I may have come across a George Yard reference in his chapter in the Mammoth book. But what I had in mind was some reference I think I may have read to Diemschutz stabling his pony there. Oh well! Bury will do just as well. Thanks, Jim.

Robert
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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 415
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Wednesday, October 08, 2003 - 1:27 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Yes, Robert, good observation concerning ‘marriage games’ in Kelly’s room. Perhaps Jack saw it as his honeymoon and was determined to make it the best night of his life?

Yes, I agree, he certainly wanted people to view his crimes as sexual - even when they were obviously not - for this was perhaps his one and only claim to adulthood. I know ‘rites of passage’ can be a difficult time for any teenager breaking through the barrier into adulthood, but Jack’s rites of passage take the biscuit.

I’m not quite sure if the character I attempt to portray would have been happy with the title ‘monster’ or similar, he certainly wanted recognition of some form but I think you may have been closer with your ‘didn’t he do well!’

Good thought with the stables and horses, always worth a closer look at bizarre or even common place press reports, for it has always been my serious contention that a serial killer’s earlier behaviour will blip up somewhere in the newspapers. I’ve experimented on this with more modern cases, like Pitchfork and Sutcliffe, and there they are in vague little reports in the local rags, not named, but their peculiar behaviour gave them away. Pitchfork in particular was like a rash all across the local press, with his indecent exposure offences, and one was able to spot him immediately by the location and behaviour. It was Pitchfork.
Bundy left a paper trail behind him that would have stretched to the moon, and this long before he ever committed a murder.
In fact I once made a bet with a senior police officer who was investigating an unsolved murder in the UK that if he sat me down in the local library with the local newspaper on micro-fiche I would find him his killer within three days. It took me two.
A minor report on some drug offences- about six months before the murder - caught my eye and I duly noted that the surname of one offender was the same as the murder victim, it transpired that it was the brother, and I postulated that if the other offender knew the brother then he just might well know the victim as well.
He did and is now serving a life sentence.
Well worth a trawl through the local rags.
Not for me though. I’m retired.
Ps. I’m dwelling on the ‘reassembly’.
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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 416
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Friday, October 10, 2003 - 2:02 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

The House that Jack Built -1

In much the same way that mathematical science can be successfully applied to purely economic situations - a relatively new discovery - I do believe that it is generally possible to apply biological science to the vexatious issue of serial killers.
As the Colony model does show we are able by the study of a simple white ant - an extremely primitive being when taken as an individual, but essential to note, highly sophisticated as a Colony - to apply certain dynamics and laws to our own biological situation, because even though as an individual we might be extremely sophisticated and advanced, the Colony that governs us is most definitely not.
This is where we as advanced individuals and the white ant as a primitive individual must part company, for the Colony model of the simple white ant is far, far more sophisticated and advanced than our own. So advanced in fact that there is no individuality amongst the individuals, only the Colony.
Without the Colony the individual white ant would quickly die, and hence has the white ant sacrificed its individuality for the common good of the Colony. Mankind still strives to find such a perfect Colony model, and it may well be millions of years before we do.

Although both the Colony and individual structures might be vastly different - between the white ant and human - the forces that govern and guide the protocols and behaviour are exactly the same for they are narrowly built on the only possible available biological and evolutionary elements and channels.
Both colonies use subtle messaging techniques to control the individual and swerve it to the Colony’s purpose. This is fact.
It may be that these subtle messages are misread by certain individuals, but equally so it might just be that very selective individuals are able to truly understand the subtle messages in a way and manner unavailable to the mass of the population.
This proportion of the population would not even reach one per cent.
I am not saying that the Colony model is a or ‘the’ solution to the behaviour of serial killers like Jack the Ripper, but it does nonetheless raise many profound issues which I believe have been blithely ignored in the mad rush to explain and explore the house that Jack built.
The most telling issue is perhaps the overwhelming fear and anxiety that many individuals within the Colony have for their Colony.
What should be a protective and reassuring all-encompassing mantle of security for all individuals of the Colony is viewed by a certain type of individual as a smothering horror. All the social padding that should protect that individual - friends, family, love, institutions and religion - is anathema to this individual, and very often he will strike out at the most obvious and cherished symbolic target of that entire social security system: Women.
The female gender - which should quite rightly be the ultimate love object for the male gender - undergoes some kind of weird transformation and distortion in the eyes and minds of these individuals.
Where we might see rounded curves and sensual image, this individual sees hatchet blades and a bloody gaping wound that can’t be healed.
And then not only does he target what should be the object of his love - either as a sister, mother, wife or lover - he specifically targets the reproductive organs of that female, and rips them out in a bloody fit of rage against that gigantic creative machine that pounds away at the bedrock of the Colony like some great hammer, as if all that blood and gore so crudely taken from the reproductive soul of the Colony will act as a magic salve against the fear that consumes him.
But it does not, for he must do it again.
Such is the fragile sand upon which Jack builds his house.

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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 949
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Friday, October 10, 2003 - 4:44 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hi AP

I think you're right about the fear of being smothered by females. The LVP may have been a period of assertive masculinity, but one wonders whether someone like Cutbush, for example, didn't find his own household not nearly assertively masculine enough.

Jack may have been killing his mother and himself when he cut out the wombs, but I wonder whether he was only killing a part of himself - and liberating or rescuing the other part. It's just a suggestion. The wombs were removed, but weren't shredded in pieces. Maybe he was as it were freeing himself from the stifling all-enclosing female body - a sort of rebirth?

If taking the organs was for magical purposes as well, one can only guess at just how he saw himself - his origin and his entire existence must have seemed to him to depend upon the incalculable vagaries of the magical. It's as if at any instant he might have gone out of existence with a pop. How's that for insecurity!

Robert

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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 417
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Friday, October 10, 2003 - 5:07 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Robert

you must stop this.
You just wrote part two for me!
Yes, I was going for a household that was smothering female with no male influence whatsoever, and yes, I was going to suggest that Jack was both killing and liberating himself with his ghastly deeds, and yes, I was going for the rebirth angle... and I still will.
Your anticipation and precipitation is a marvel.
I take me hat off to you yet again.
Who Cutbush?
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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 418
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Saturday, October 11, 2003 - 1:31 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Tick Tock

Tick Tock I got clock
Some call watch.
But I broke it clean
In funny dream.
So I pretend
Watch to mend.
Coils and springs all around
Shards of glass on ground.
I dropped it in awful sudden fright
Something terrible come last night.
There it lay, all askew
Every bit and every screw.
Even though I gather the whole
The watch will surely never go.
Must be missing little bit
For I listen but no tick.
And no tock
From broken clock.
I shove it all back in
Maybe then tick begin.
But hands stay still
Hands they kill.
I pick up all them things
Swap the coils for springs
And shove them in
But still no tick begin.
And no tock
From broken watch.
I listen but no sound
I turn the watch around
All the bits fall down
But still no sound
Can be found.
Not a tick not a tock
From broken clock.
I put it all neat
There on street.
Horse come, clip
Me go quick
Horse come, clop
Tick tock.


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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 959
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Saturday, October 11, 2003 - 3:06 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Very nice indeed, AP. Like any child who takes something apart to find out how it works, Jack can't put it back together again. You've anticipated me here, for I was going to have a bit in my poem where Jack holds Kelly's heart to his ear, shakes it and wonders why it's stopped, then puts it in his pocket to repair later.

Very clever, the coils!

Horse come? Poetic licence, for I know you don't count Stride as a victim, nor was she mutilated. Strange though, because in "Hickory Dickory Dock" the clock struck one and the mouse ran down.

Robert

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AP Wolf
Inspector
Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 419
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Sunday, October 12, 2003 - 12:51 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Robert

Thank you for the kind words.
You are as perceptive as ever, for the image in my mind as I wrote the end was of Berner Street Club as Diemschutz approached with his pony and cart. It shouldn't have been, but it was.
Maybe I know something that even I didn't know?
I also did picture the scene with Kelly's heart and that was the main core of the poesie, so again great minds athinking alike.
Anyway, I must press on for I have a house to demolish.
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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 420
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Sunday, October 12, 2003 - 1:44 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

The House that Jack Built 2

Design is the essence of nature.
Hence when we look at a design board the vast majority of us will see a use and a purpose, but just perhaps when an individual like Jack looks at a design board he sees no use or purpose… and then purposefully sets out to redesign the design board to match the peculiar images in his head.
You must note that we talk about the origins here of great works of art; and thoughts and concepts which lift humanity to a higher dimension through the combined genie of great thinkers and doers of the calibre of Einstein, Blake, Picasso and da Vinci; and we also talk of murder most foul.
For it is my earnest contention that it is the very same spark that fires and vitalizes the genie and the asexual serial killer of the nature of Jack, for artist, poet, scientist and killer all look at the design board in exactly the same way, with a view to change.
And it is this tiny tick on the tormented soul of mankind that does provide for the absolute highpoints of our civilization, but equally so feeds the very real need of that same civilization to descend to the absolute gutters of the hell we carry with us… and believe it or not that tormented urge is the creative fuse that makes up the all-important one per cent of the population who are charged by evolutionary biology to have their hands on the rudder of the Colony.
For their contribution - whether it is a negative or positive contribution - is the fire in our soul, what they produce, whether it be art, words, music or murder most foul is the very stuff of ultimate emotional experience for the remaining 99% of the colony.
They are the dream catchers of the Colony.
Hence Jack’s popularity today, for regardless of how heinous his crimes, we all do - by proxy - walk in the footsteps of such bloody murder and mayhem, and by doing so we are briefly able to pick up the brush of Picasso and paint Einstein’s theory of relativity on a chalkboard to the nodding approval of William Blake.
We then become part of that elusive one per cent - normally excluded to us - for a brief moment of time, and we go on that journey with Jack and other serial killers because they are perhaps the only vehicle available to us, for none of us in reality will ever paint like Picasso and none of us in reality will ever write like William Blake, but we all could kill like Jack.
It seems that Jack is not the only one to be building a house on fragile sand.
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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 970
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Sunday, October 12, 2003 - 2:54 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hi AP

I think I see what you're saying here. So, who knows what Jack would have become if his genes hadn't been a bit funny, or his upbringing had been different?

We know from the lives of many artists that there is a very fine line between creativity
and madness. So why not the other way round?

It does sometimes seem that we're all engaged in a rather donnish discussion on the authorship of a certain poem, or the painter of a certain disputed picture. And when it comes to getting inside the mind of the killer, it's a bit like "What is the meaning of 'Hamlet'?" These discussions we find fascinating, while to outsiders they're pointless, boring and incomprehensible!

I think that often, before the act of creation, there is the period of listening - which is why creativity has tended (though not exclusively) to occur amongst the leisured classes (education is only a part of it, and is sometimes not even necessary). So if the crimes were in some way artistic, I suppose we would have to look at the leisured classes, plus the unemployed. In fact I think your theory would fit very well with someone who had time on his hands, time which he spent gazing at pictures from medical books and idly bouncing his world around the way Charlie Chaplin's Hitler toyed with his balloon globe.

Another point about creation is possibly it's therapeutic value. Was it Goethe who said something about "repairing the damage of a lifetime"? Maybe Jack was trying to repair the damage of a lifetime.

Robert
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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 422
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Monday, October 13, 2003 - 1:02 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Good points Robert

funny how we like the same images. I have always been fond of Chaplin's Hitler bouncing the world about in his study, great comedy, but also great art.
I think you already know that I have my money on a young man obsessed with medical books, not any particular young man, just a young man with such obsessions.
I'll be posting the last section of this colonic irrigation tonight, as I've decided enough is enough and am now going to make the Colony my winter's work and expand it into something which might one day be a book about the real Jack, but rest assured it will be written without a suspect in mind.
I shall still contribute to the poetry boards, but perhaps less heavy weight missives.
I haven't finished with your post yet and will get back to you before the ten o'clock watershed.
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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 423
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Posted on Monday, October 13, 2003 - 2:16 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

The House that Jack pulled Down

So are we over the unfolding course of a century viewing some sort of evolutionary device that is feeding the very real rage at the heart of the Colony machine?
An almost cyclical process where a single individual is charged and responsible for a dramatic event or image that then goes on to magically influence the entire Colony, who then in turn feed that machine once more with the glorification of that event or image by reproducing that event or image ad-infinitum until it reaches epidemic proportions where it then in turn influences yet another individual to attempt - sometimes successfully and sometimes not - to replicate that event or image in his own manner… and that great machine keeps turning and feeding on itself.
Thus does the Colony select specific individuals from the one per cent to carry out the secret wishes and desires of the remaining 99%.
For we cannot easily dismiss the massive and catastrophic influence that is exerted on specific individuals - perhaps vulnerable, perhaps creative - by the proclamation and dispersal of events and images that are perhaps disturbing to our logical ‘self’, but certainly appealing to the creative ‘self’.
It might seem odd, when not perverse - initially - to classify destructive events or images as appealing to the creative nature of mankind, but one only needs to examine true and great works of art and literature to see that it is indeed so, for basic bodily destruction does seem to be very much part of the creative process.
As Jesus said: ‘I die so that you might live’.
And there it is in a nutshell. Destruction is part of creation.
One certainly sees this reflected in the thoughts, behaviour and actions of asexual serial killers of the nature of Jack.
Thus is the mission defined.
These very specific killers firmly believe that what they do is some kind of magical cure-all for the ails of mankind: and that from appalling destructive events and images they will be able to conjure up a magical creative process that gives birth to that essential spark that appears to be missing from the soul of mankind.
To define exactly what that missing ‘spark’ might be is beyond the ken of the 99%, for only the one per cent are privy to that, however it is my contention that this missing ‘spark’ has as its raw base a fearful regard and suspicion of the female gender, with its poisonous roots buried deep within the damaged and fragile psyche of the spurned man.
Spurned by mother and then spurned by would-be lover.
As trite as this may sound the force I talk of here is probably the driving force behind most great crimes, and great works of art, science and literature. It is probably the most compelling force in our universe.
However - and here I take a space ship to the stars - the compulsive killing urges of asexual serial killers could just as easily have their roots buried in the mischievous nature of the spoilt or unhappy child who dismantles a watch and then unable to put it back together again, he destroys it, so that it will never be of use to anyone again.
The clock ticks, for such behaviour probably has as its core substance a basic sexual jealousy of the female gender and its frightening and uncanny ability to bring forth almost perfect replicas of itself with what amounts to very little help from the male gender.
Hence does Jack rip out those reproductive organs, for that puts a dramatic halt to this magical nonsense once and for all.

Bang, bang. I reckon I got him right between the eyes that time.
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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 978
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Monday, October 13, 2003 - 5:05 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hi AP

I thought there might be a book coming!

Two words you used rang particularly loud bells : "jealousy" and "mischievous" (or maybe rather, "bloody-minded").

I do think an awful lot of human culture has been down to the fact that men can't have children - so they have paintings, symphonies, poems, scientific theories etc instead. Of course, that won't work for the cultural creations of women, but that's another issue.

I think it's entirely plausible that a frustrated artist such as you envisage might have a deep-seated envy of the female reproductive organs.

And then, "mischievous" or bloody-minded. I think that buried deep in the male psyche there is a passion for the pointless. I think men really do climb mountains because they're there! I once saw a programme about a pair of mathematician brothers who spent all their spare time trying to compute the decimal determination of pi to X million places. I got the impression that they were doing it simply because they wanted to.

I don't think the primary reason that men do mathematics, the arts or the sciences is to help people or build a better world, though that may come into it. At the heart of most men there is something that screams against the idea of a lifetime spent being useful. It's almost as if they deliberately seek out impractical and useless things to do, and then do them. That's not to say that art and science have no value or are of no benefit to society - only that it's not the reason they're done.

I defy any English literature teacher to galvanise a group of boy pupils with the line "Become a great poet. Give pleasure to millions. Teach people new ways of seeing things. And thus make yourselves useful."

"I climbed the mountain because it was there. I ripped the woman because she was there."

PS Does the suspension of Colony mean that I have to finish my Mary Kelly hip-hop poem?


Robert
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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 425
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Monday, October 13, 2003 - 5:23 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Robert

thank you.
Yes I'm afraid the hip-hop era is upon us.
I'm in Mauritius now for some time but I shall try to hip to your hop whenever I get the chance.
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AP Wolf
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Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 427
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Posted on Tuesday, October 14, 2003 - 2:16 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Voyage

A sure fire cure for echolalia
Is to pluck a black dahlia
And then smell that power
When you pluck that flower.
And so do hopeful authors wish
That Joe gutted more than fish.
With bold type and exclamation mark
Thus do the unwary and untried embark
On ship bound for fortune grand
But anchor holds ship fast to land.
‘Land ahoy!’ they shout afore they sail
Imagining themselves in fearful gale
throwing water out by bucket and pail.
‘We’ll not sink for by god we can swim!’
But voyage has yet to begin.
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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 992
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 14, 2003 - 3:05 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Very wicked, AP. I liked that a lot (but no offence to Leanne and Richard).

NIGHTMARE

I had a hellish nightmare,
I dreamt I wrote a book.
I swore I'd serve the right fare,
Name Jack by hook or crook.

"Man overboard!" I heard the cry,
A cry that drove me crazy.
A thousand experts had let fly
And called my witness hazy.

And as I sailed the oceans wide
My limbs they froze in fear.
I found my victims had all died
Wrong day, wrong month, wrong year.

With sinking feeling I rounded the Horn -
My suspect hadn't yet been born.

But as I cleaved the homeward swell
A hundred thousand barks
Came out en masse to wish me well -
Then threw me to the sharks.

Robert
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AP Wolf
Inspector
Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 428
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 14, 2003 - 4:49 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Bravo Robert

enjoyed your nautical effort very much as well.
However I feel that it is me who will go to the sharks.
The sea breeze is worth it.
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Robert Charles Linford
Chief Inspector
Username: Robert

Post Number: 998
Registered: 3-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 14, 2003 - 5:14 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Thanks AP. I would not advise going swimming off Mauritius, but if you do be sure to keep a copy of Cornwell's book in your hand - no shark would swallow that.

Robert
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AP Wolf
Inspector
Username: Apwolf

Post Number: 430
Registered: 2-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 14, 2003 - 5:25 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

rest assured Robert,

I have five copies with me, just for safety, and I have heard that the whale shark is able to swallow a single copy without so much as a review.
Much like the Sunday Times then.

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