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Suzi Hanney
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Suzi
Post Number: 1514
Registered: 7-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, November 20, 2004 - 9:13 am: |       |
Hi!
Following a heroic battle on ebay Ive become the proud owner(!) of a book of'Great Cockney Songs' (sadly mostly modern) but including .....
'The Ballad of Jack the Ripper'
OK here we go..This is possibly the ultimate in Ripper bad taste!
1. It happened in Whitechapel in the year of eighty eight,
When several naughty ladies met a rather gruesome fate,
Their murd'rer prowled the east ends streets,
and tho it sounds absurd,
When they cried out"D-yer want a bit",
E took them at their word
Chorus
Oh! Jack the Ripper
'E carved his way to fame,
Nobody ever saw him but they all knew his name,
and when the mist is swirling thick,
Around the Thames-side mud,
'is ghost still 'aunts the silent streets
a-lookin' for some blood
2.(They) found a woman's body in a nasty state one night,
The coroner 'e laughed and smiled to see the gory sight;
The p'lice thought this improper as the street with blood was speckled,
"Who is that man" the Inspector asked,
They answered "Doctor Jekyll"
Chorus
3. Now Sherlock Holmes was on the sopt and said "I'll bet my shirt,
This villain Jack the Ripper must be the Prince Albert"
As he stepped back the place went black for all the
Gas lamps fused
And even Queen Victoria said"We are not amused"
Chorus
4.A girl was walking down the street in Aldgate after dark
Now Jack the Ripper menaced her,though only for a lark
She fled into a barber's shop,not looking where she trod,
But it couldn't have been 'er night because his name was
Sweeney Todd!
Chorus
5.Th' inspector was called out one night t'observe a special case,
The lady had been lacerated right up to 'er face
When someone asked him"Why d'you think 'e's made 'er such a mess?"
Th' inspector said "She must have been a cut above the rest!"
Chorus
6.Now Jack 'e was a fam'ly man what lived wiv 'is old mum
They sat down every night to supper when the day was done,
And when 'is muvver asked him,"Jack fetch me a piece of tart,"
'E said,"D'you want a change this week,or the usual ribs and heart?"
Chorus
WOW!!!!!!....All together now!!!!!
Suzi
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Robert Charles Linford
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Robert
Post Number: 3511
Registered: 3-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, November 20, 2004 - 9:23 am: | |
Great stuff, Suzi. I wonder who wrote that one.
Robert |
Dan Norder
Inspector
Username: Dannorder
Post Number: 372
Registered: 4-2004
| | Posted on Sunday, November 21, 2004 - 2:31 am: | |
Hi Suzi,
Cool, in a morbid but fun way. The chorus is pretty decent. Did they happen to mention a date on this song? It sounds to my amateur ear somewhat modern.
Of course the whole Prince Albert mention is interesting. It could have come after some of the royal conspiracy angle or possibly inspired it. It'd be quite humorous if the world's most well-known Ripper theory got its start as a throwaway joke in a verse of a song... although I'm guessing the song came later after the idea was already out there.
Dan Norder, editor, Ripper Notes |
Suzi Hanney
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Suzi
Post Number: 1515
Registered: 7-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, November 21, 2004 - 7:21 am: | |
Hi Robert and Dan,
As I said,sadly most of the songs are modern ..It appears to have been penned by James Home and the music is attributed to one Thornton G. Roper The copyright date is 1974.
Bit of fun though!
Suzi |
Suzi Hanney
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Suzi
Post Number: 1516
Registered: 7-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, November 21, 2004 - 1:04 pm: | |
Going to get a child at school to scan in the music in the absence of my knowledge on that!
Then....... all together now!!!
Cheers
Suzi |
Jennifer D. Pegg
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Jdpegg
Post Number: 1283
Registered: 2-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, November 21, 2004 - 1:09 pm: | |
Suzi,
I look forward to it!!
Jenni |
Suzi Hanney
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Suzi
Post Number: 1518
Registered: 7-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, November 21, 2004 - 3:33 pm: | |
Hehe! good one eh! xx Cheers Jen!
Suzi |
Robert Charles Linford
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Robert
Post Number: 3523
Registered: 3-2003
| | Posted on Monday, November 22, 2004 - 8:55 am: | |
OK, Suzi, prepare yourself for a bloody awful ballad.
THE BALLAD OF FOG
The fog was so thick that the rats had to cough
The peasants were choking, and even a toff
Would die if he walked with his overcoat off
Back in the days of Jack
Poor Polly was staggering drunken and freezing
When out of the fog came the sound of loud wheezing
And then round her throat icy fingers were squeezing
The fingers belonged to Jack
Dark Annie she wandered the early dawn gloom
And in the backyard she was lured to her doom
Jack coughed up his lungs and she coughed up her womb
A sickly fellow was Jack
Elisabeth Stride met a hideous end
Murdered while sucking a Fisherman's Friend
She had a sore throat that no lozenge could mend
The murderer's name was Jack
Kate Eddowes just couldn't decide what to do
So she went to the Square to meet someone she knew
She caught Jacky's wrath and she caught Jacky's flu
Sad victim of spluttering Jack
In Kelly's room, fog swirled so thick round her head
Twice she got lost 'twixt the fire and the bed
They found her next morning, all foggy and dead
The very last victim of Jack
It's easy enough now to find where the site is
The murder spot reeks of catarrh and bronchitis
A summer day's cold as a wintery night is
The foulest murder of Jack
He must have had some deep unresolved issue
He plunged in the knife and he cut through her tissue
He left with her heart and he left with "Atishoo!"
That horrible man called Jack
Now listen in case my warning you've missed
When you are in London, steer clear of the mist
You just might be the next on his list
He's still in the fog, and he's Jack
Robert
(Message edited by Robert on November 22, 2004)
(Message edited by Robert on November 22, 2004) |
Suzi Hanney
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Suzi
Post Number: 1522
Registered: 7-2003
| | Posted on Monday, November 22, 2004 - 3:40 pm: | |
ROBERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You MUST get out more!!!!!!!...I Love it!!!!!!!!! TUNE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
suzi |
Robert Charles Linford
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Robert
Post Number: 3526
Registered: 3-2003
| | Posted on Monday, November 22, 2004 - 4:33 pm: | |
Suzi, the only tunes I ever write I do in my sleep. I wake up with them going round my head, but since I know nothing of musical notation I can't write them down. An hour or so later, I've forgotten them.
Robert |
Suzi Hanney
Assistant Commissioner
Username: Suzi
Post Number: 1526
Registered: 7-2003
| | Posted on Thursday, November 25, 2004 - 6:38 pm: | |
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ALONGAROBERT eh! all together now!
Hey hope you get those Asteroids(oops crossing threads here!) sorted out soon!!!!!! Pain in the **** eh!....tell ya what though that mysterious 'preparation' is damned good for the old bags under the eyes! on That note MUST get some zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzs and see if the odd tune comes through!!!
Nite!
Suzi |
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